THE ONE I LOVE.

Like a zebra among warthogs,
Is my beloved among virgins!

The choicest of red diamonds,
Purest of them all,
Courage have they not
To rival the sparkle in the eyes of my beloved!

Outstanding among ten thousand,
With a rainbow for a smile,
Is my peacock;
Humbler and finer than eighty queens!

The teeth of my beloved,
Are like white- Egrets in a morning procession!

Of polished ivory is her body,
Easy to take for a craftsman’s work!

From her chest,
Rises breasts,
Like elephant tusks!

Then from her mouth
Comes a 'stench',
Purer in scent than the finest perfumes!
But did I tell you,
That when annoyed becomes my beloved,
Of honey drips her eyes?

The voice of my darling,
So sweet and sultry,
Like the tunes of a violin!

The compassion she has
Is that of mothers
In their thousands counted!
For virtue sits on her head,
Like a crown that defines royalty.

On her betrothal night,
To her parents I surrendered
Jewels that dazzled in her eyes;
And scared away my competitors for her hand,
Like RUJUMBA- ABWOOLI,
Cub to the great Lion,
The king of our village.

To guard her,
I shall hire a regiment of warriors,
Braver and fiercer than the Abarusuura* of King Kabalega.

With arrows,
And shields of cow-hide, I shall arm them:
More poisonous than the angriest black mamba!

In our village
Champion smelters I shall hire
To make my beloved spears
Of bronze shafts and heads of gold
Finer than Amahango*!

Her entourage
Shall stroll down the hills of Kabale,
With the majesty
Of stars that twinkle in a night’s procession!

-KYOMUHENDO- ATEENYI-

*Abarusuura- Very able warriors of the mighty EMPEROR- OMUKAMA CWA II KABALEEGA of BUNYORO- KITARA

*Amahango- The royal, beautiful and olden spears of the Chwezi Kings famed for conquest. They are a cherished regalia among the BANYORO peoples.

YOWERI MUSEVENI IS NAKED!

ABWOOLI RUJUMBA- OMURUNGI W'ABASAMBU, While still a primary two pupil of KIHANDE MUSLIM PRIMARY SCHOOL in Kihande II village, Masindi District, many interesting stories were told to us by our English teachers. However what struck most of us was the tale of an Emperor who hired a genius of the village to design him a royal garment of woven gold and diamonds.

His majesty gave this village whiz kid a considerable amount of gold and silver. The whiz kid delivered as he promised- a sparkling robe of magnificence and splendor. Amidst drumbeats, chanting, and ululations from his subjects, the triumphal Emperor strolled down his palace and paraded all through the streets showcasing his new gown. The genius of the village actually designed a robe which only the non-sinners could see! Unknown to the gullible Emperor and his subjects, the crafty genius had actually woven a classy web of a trick.

There was no robe, the gold was gone and the Emperor was actually naked! It actually took the courage of a little boy to realize that the King was naked!

Reader, if you cannot notice that Emperor Yoweri Kaguta Museveni is naked, then you are a relentless sinner.

I have elsewhere written;

“Amidst moaning women, groaning men, fury, tears, fire and blood, the weeping million peoples of Africa have been left privy to the despotic tendencies of some African despots who not only cherish life presidency but also twist, curve, bend, break and mend their country’s constitutions to oil their power thirsty throats.

For the above, African heads have feverishly endeavored, with all their magnanimous might, to eradicate all imminent opposition to their thrones of power from their alien subjects.

This whistles piercingly, the increasing pain orgy suffered by the opposition chiefs. They not only endure skillfully orchestrated election defeats but are also threatened to or do actually serve long prison terms. The incumbents are thereafter let in the political kraals alone appreciating the warmth of kingly robes.”(In my unpublished article to the New Vision titled ‘KIBAKI CAN SAVE HIS BRETHREN’ on the Kenya election crisis.)"

When a regime is in a free fall, at least from the pages of history, it starts a rather drastic and aggressive desire to defy momentum. To cling to the top, the patriarchy of that failed government is characteristically merciless and unbending especially when it comes to safeguarding their lofty summit of power. Any eminent threat to their ill- gotten wealth is ruthlessly averted; at least you can trust they can deliver on that!

Pursuant of this dire need, the lead-rogue, who in this case is the Executive president, is always very ready to devour any heart, suffocate any opposition, submerge any ‘nosy’ press, enter into any alliances (however unholy), recklessly point the eye of the barrel, gluttonously thieve a nation and even develop an intricate talent of election robbing. In all this unjust cause, he turns the other arms of government into mere hand-clappers. The parliament is generously rewarded, the learned judges are skillfully appointed, and in the short run, in triumph he belches with an unabated satisfaction!

However in all these exploits, history has dignifiedly told us, there grows a large section of discontented people. One by one they retreat and develop into small waves, which, as the discontent spreads, form a great and robust wave that finally washes into oblivion, the towers of oppression.

There are all signs that the empire, built on the foundations of deceit, dishonesty, theft, tribalism and sectarianism, is crumbling upon its master- builder, Mr. Museveni. The time of reckoning, it is manifest, seems to be finally impending!


The law is being applied selectively. It therefore does not raise eyebrows to see big fish like John Patrick Amama Mbabazi of the villainous Temangalo- gate, Specioza- Kazibwe of the Valley Dams chronicle, Katugugu Muhwezi of the Global fund master- class act stroll free in shiny cars as small fish like Teddy Seezi- Cheeye are condemned to the coolers for decades.

Dear reader, this is not to mean that I am in defense of Mr. Cheeye. The law should be seen to be applied impartially. Let us not cheer Emperor Museveni parade naked. In solitary voices, let us condemn his excesses. These voices shall one day unite and shout down this regime of thugs.

ERIAB IRABAHAKE OMUTABANI W'AMINONI JACK, it is now a year- but may the most gracious; the most almighty, judge your heroic soul with chronic mercy. Rest in endless peace, wise gray- haired.


-KYOMUHENDO- ATEENYI-

MAKERERE: A NEST IN THE WIND!

ABWOOLI RUJUMBA- OMURUNGI W'ABASAMBU, fellow countrymen, gallant Makerereans, proud warriors in the academic battle-grounds ; please receive my well intentioned greetings of love, compassion and hope.

The time has now dawned at this great university where we as a people have to determine the course of our destiny at the hallowed pulpit of democracy. The guild elections are finally here and so is the oppotunity to vote a candidate, as guild president, who shall cut the umblical cord that ties Makerere to tribulations.

The green hills of Makerere are being ravaged by a buzzing wind of locusts that is eating away the green- leaves of sanity and honesty, it’s robe of pride is now tattered and torn !

The rottenness and muck in this great university is profoundly entrenched in the system that it flows from top to bottom, bottom to top ! No wonder it is reminiscent of this MUSEVENI'S failed government.

Of the reputable universities known to me in the world, it is only in Makerere that we have professors copying from their students. It is only in Makerere that top officials in the senate, faculty adminstrators and registrars report for work at 5 :00pm and retire to their abodes at exactly 6 :00pm or not at all.

It is also only at Makerere that we have not an independent vice- chancellor, but one who belongs to the ruling party. Not one appointed to deliver results as expected, but one who can break the party into this highly revered opposion stronghold, as insinuated by the the honourable minister of National guidance- KABAKUMBA- MATSIKO, at the send-off dinner of the out-going guild executive !

It is the Visitor of this university (The president of the republic),through influence peddling, who appoints as vice chancellor a man he believes will paint the university yellow like the golden rays that come of the morning sun !

Gallant Makerereans, we are unfortunate to have a Visitor whose patriotism and love for this young nation is in doubt. A Visitor who does not pull out knives to stab the rabied thieves in his back-yard, but affectionately regards them ! A Visitor who stares on in satisfaction as the national coffers run dry courtersy of his blue-eyed gluttons ! A visitor who digs deep into tax- payers money to lavish himself a comfortable monster jet at a whooping price of 88 billion shillings as his people die of jiggers !

In this Visitor we have a falcona who is determined, at whatever cost, to tame the Ugandan falcons for life because he purports to be the only one with a vision ! I shall not talk about this beloved Visitor of ours who has turned the Kaguta family into Uganda’s rulling dynasty !

Reader, allow me to conceal this other apprentice- Kaguta who is beeing groomed in the ways of how best to wield Uganda’s instruments of power !

Ugandans are known allover the world as a hospitable people but there is one trait that the tourists have failed to identify in us and that is our unappreciative nature. I hold it as the highest act of ingratitude for Ugandans not to laud meritious appointments and blow trumpets of praise for the appointing authorities. Why should Ugandans go ahead and question the ‘concealed’ Kaguta’s capability for the top job ? Do they know how capable he is ? Is he not the most competent candidate for the job ?

He is a learned and handsome young man. He has topped his infantry class on more than one occation. He is disciplined and ably trained in matters of war and diplomacy. He has gone to the best millitary academies in the world. He has been to Sandhurst, Fort Lavenworth, The peoples republic of China, the Jammihiriyah state of Libya and has excelled with distinction ! Who is better qualified than him ? This is a humble cry to Ugandans to be thankful.

The lion has been inhabitant of Africa since the dawn of time. All through the gone generations, the peoples of Africa have developed lingua to refer to this ferocious beast. The lovely descendants of GIKUYU and MUMBI have refered to it as Muruthi. The hard working peoples of the rolling Kabaale hills call it Ekicuncu, the Karimojong christened it Engatun. The gallant Banyoro-Batooro call it Entale and so do the Banyankore of Ankole. The Langi and the Acholi have prefered to name it Labwor.

The swahili speaking peoples are not forgotten in calling it Simba. Whatever the name asceded to this great member of the cat family, a singular voice is heard when appellating its character.

Hunters speak of it’s courage, gatherers of firewood sing of it’s bravery, legends tell of of its strength as wild- food gatherers bellow aloud its power. They also chorus of how it’s as serene, compassionate and temperemental as only a woman can be. My grandmother used to warn us of it’s roar.

Before us, several guid presidential candidates are running errands to seek our votes and present their credentials. To you they spit petals of flowers for speeches. Unto you they groan and moan of ideas very noble. In the midst of them is a woman !

Gallant scholars, the thirst of Makerere can only be quenched by a fighter for a leader. One who shall gather the pile of ruins to re-mould the great Makerere pot with clay mixed with red gold.

A leader who shall inherit the idea-vacant plot of Makerere and raise it to the sky. One who shall talk of peace and reconcilliation.

A leader who is as brave, courageous, charismatic, strong and powerful as a lion !

One who shall make us forget the salt taste of tears. He who shall make us dance to the rythm of violence if need be. That one who shall ring the bell of victory from the corridors of Livingstone hall to be heard on the slopes of LUMUMBA hall, from the highest point of MARY-STUART to the humble land of the statesmen-Nsibirwa.

It is not the Visitors of the day that we desire as leaders but men and women of tested and proven character. Please let the arsenal of your votes shoot into office a man or woman of a character that noble and if that one goes through, we shall hire maiden virgins to make him, with their mouths, a garment of ivory better to wear than a crown of priceless jewels.

I pray we as a people supersede party affiliations, sex, one’s appearance or how deep or shallow one’s pockets are. Remember the hope of a better tommorrow lies in your well-cast vote.

Kamau Simon-MAKERERE LAW SOCIETY PRESIDENT- ELECT, congratulations upon that very noble triumph. We are all exceedingly proud of you. That is attestation enough that the East- African dream is still alive.

All the best eligible voters. All the best gallant hopefulls.


-KYOMUHENDO-ATEENYI-

THE DEFEAT OF THE UNION JACK!

ABWOOLI RUJUMBA- OMURUNGI W'ABASAMBU, Whilst the battle shots of the second chimurenga war-furnace rang aloud between the years 1966-1980, a KUTAMA- born shockingly brilliant ex-school teacher turned liberation war champion- ROBERT GABRIEL MUGABE was ferociously spreading his propaganda of freedom with abandon. He often roared unto his fighters; 'that when you see gold rust, then it was not gold in the first place: it was actually brass- for true gold does not rust!

Thus in the aftermath of the protracted and arduous liberation war, under the wise and futurist guidance of comrade Mugabe, Zimbabwe finally won a compassionate date with lady freedom.

Thus it follows that the great house- as the lynx Zimbabwe translates in the great Shona tongue, was redeemed from the predatory and insatiable jaws of British lunacy, cowardice, loot, rape, pillage and plunder that was dazzlingly masked in the molten garment of Brutish imperialism.

It is therefore no news that that the colonial machine devoured millions of blameless black women, children and men but it is news that this age birthed probably modern times most skilled firebrand priest at the altar of hope for the submerged nations of Africa and the world. If imperialism, true to its ways, thought that in comrade Mugabe it had won itself a pawn to superimpose its curse on the black beloved deep in the somersaulting hills of Mashona- land, it was in for a rude shock!

Obscened with the courage of ten mother-leopards robbed of cubs combined, Comrade Mugabe was to later on bare his claws and aim poisoned arrows of decency at the brettonwood corridors and 10 Downing street- the official residence of the British prime minister.

Because of Mugabe's noble ideals and ruthless rhetoric against evil that is West, Tony Blair during his times embarked on a despicable campaign to demerit and throw mud at the lofty feat clinched by the Mugabe administration back in the beautiful Harare city.

It should be noted with such jealousy that before nonsense prevailed over reason among the so- called 'great' powers to admonish Dr. Mugabe, Zimbabwe was a thriving economy with the best literacy rate in Africa, promising GDP growths, an infrastructural boom and the ideal destination for experts in economics who wanted the fine-looking peoples of Zimbabwe to share with them their success story.

As the door of 10 downing shut behind the ill-mannered Blair, in came a man whose mother forgot to teach the etiquette of diplomacy as prime minister-elect. That man was Gordon Brown- prior on foreign secretary.

Brown inherited an office that has famed itself over the centuries to have built an empire on the decaying bones of the submerged peoples and sustaining it on their blood. And he did turn out to be its brilliant apprentice.

Using the land question in Zimbabwe that was ably and perfectly handled by the ageing comrade to veil imperialism's true face, Gordon, as he is fondly known in power circles of Britain, openly attacked the Harare administration and poured scorn allover it. He on a number of occasions threatened boycott vital symposiums if Mugabe did attend.

He influenced the backyard of imperialism, the EUROPEAN UNION, to slap more sanctions on Mugabe's regime. He attempted to break the first cracks of insanity in the African Union fortress. He along with the administration he was representing groomed a stooge in Morgan Richard Tsvangirai.

He also, with the support of the Washington rule, injected billions in the print and electronic media to depose Mugabe. He unsuccessfully plotted assassination attempts through good nurtured top army chiefs who at all times briefed their commander about the design.

As a result, his efforts were rewarded with sky- rocketing inflation in the country, high unemployment levels, millions of deprived people, a cholera outbreak and hunger that choked thousands into silence!

Confronted with all that could have forced even the bravest and most courageous of men to hoist the flag of surrender, Mugabe just hardened on the oppressors until they were forced to send their glove-puppet- Tsvangirai to talk peace with a man famed for a heart as hard as a diamond!

In the struggles of Mr. Mugabe, the world has been blessed with the opportunity to spot Africa's true friends and mortal foes. We have seen true African patriots like Mzee Mbeki, Libyan leader Col. Muammer el Qhadaffi,inter alia.

We have also seen comrade Mugabe's clenched fist tear through the air in defiance. And we have also been made to reaffirm that indeed true gold does not rust. It is on such a background that I submit that the name ROBERT GABRIEL MUGABE be cut on the cherished memorial tablet of Africa's braves. He has a throne for a seat in the great balcony of Africa's greatest heroes. I also laud him for candidly telling Buckingham that it can try to hide the spots of the hyena of imperialism but cannot forever hide its smell.

Dearest Mugabe, - Zimbabwe, Africa, and the submerged peoples littered around the world owe you a bottomless and severe debt of gratitude. Of how you make them chest thump with pride, the Gods of our land can exclusively tell. May you live longer than your fore- fathers. May you forever keep the great bonfire of the African hope glowing brighter and mightier. God bless you gallant son of Africa, brave son of the soil.

PAMBERI NE CHIMURENGA!
(Forward with the revolution)

KYOMUHENDO- ATEENYI